Monday, December 13, 2010

A long overdue update

For those of you who have visited this blog since 2008, I apologize for not paying more attention to this site. Since my last post, my husband and I sold our house and moved to a different state and my mind was not on the blog. So I forgot that I had to moderate comments!

A few of you have asked me for an update on my 'SD'. Here it is.

Rarely if ever do I think about my voice or how my voice is coming across to others. In fact, I notice more and more that it sounds strong and well. This does not mean that I don’t experience physical symptoms from time to time. I know that my stress (or unconscious ‘rage’ as Dr. Sarno puts it) expresses itself in many physical symptoms for me. If it isn’t my voice, it’s neck and shoulder pain, migraines or gastrointestinal distress. I of course have been to conventional doctors for these things and know that there is nothing ‘physically’ wrong with me. So I step back and I observe all of these symptoms and know deep down that they are my mind’s attempt to distract me from whatever unconscious emotional pain or rage that I have. And I discipline myself to focus on what may be contributing to my anger, rage or upset, and not the physical manifestation. So while the physical symptoms may be uncomfortable…I know they are not going to kill me. The only exception would be the migraines! I do take a drug (Maxalt) to ‘abort’ migraines when they come and take Topiramate daily to prevent them. Migraine pain is unbearable. So I continue to work on these things. And I do know that the stress of travel and sleep disruption triggers my migraines. But I have yet to master the mind-body connection to the extent that I don’t have migraines.

But I must say that overall, I spend very little time obsessing on these symptoms. I remember a time when one or more of these symptoms consumed my life. But not now. Now I choose to focus on other things...like my family, my two dogs, my work, my hobbies, and helping other people. I find a lot more joy there.